Here we are. Week one! We haven’t met the girls and Juan Pablo has already been jogging twice. And Sean’s here with really good advice: ‘If you kiss one of the girls, don’t let the other girls see!’ Smooth Sean, very smooth!

We get another sneak peek at the women before JP meets them, and off the bat Nikki is my favorite. I haven’t been this excited about a contestant since Emily Maynard. It certainly helps that she’s a pediatric nurse, and in her vignette she works with a little girl with down-syndrome. If you learn nothing else about me in this little trip we’re about to take, it’ll be this, I have a very, VERY special place in my heart for special needs kids. I adore them! But it’s not about me so onto the ladies…

(side note: I will likely be watching with my mom a lot, so I’ll share mom’s thoughts along the way, as well.)

Here. We. Go!! We’re about to meet the top 25 27!! I’m adding pictures to help us all out with the names and faces. 

Amy, 27 – She seems nice enough. Nothing about her felt lasting, but I don’t hate her.

Cassandra, 21 – TWENTY ONE!!!! And awkward. She’s probably wearing her prom dress!

Christy, 24 – Girls who wear white on the first night make me really uncomfortable. It feels like a desperate cry for a ring.

Christine, 23 – She brought a gift for the daughter. Suck up!

Nikki, 26 – I’ve already said it, she’s my favorite! And appears to be his favorite too! (Nikki the Nurse)

Kat, 29 – Can we call her Kitty Kat? At least she smells good.

Chantel, 27 – Your name isn’t that hard to pronounce. Sorry. We didn’t need a lesson. Get over yourself.

Victoria, 24 – Tripped a little getting out of the car, Judged. Lay off the champagne.

Lucy, 24 – Free Spirit is apparently a life path. Mom says: ‘The ’70s called, they want their love child back.’ (Lucy the Love Child)

Danielle, 25 – I don’t even remember her… so, there’s that.

Lauren S., 26 – She plays the piano, allegedly. And doesn’t introduce herself. Fail.

Next car is pulling up, OH MY GOD!!!

Chelsie, 24 – Someone needs to learn to be herself. Otherwise, I enjoy her

Valerie, 26 – She’s really pretty. According to herself.

Elise, 27 – They have a lot in common.

Ashley, 25 – I’m giving you a Gold star sticker! For what? He just showed up! You’re too easy!

Fake preggers before commercial break, I’m already turned off.

Clare, 32 – Oh, haha it’s not real! I have a video to show you, recorded by my dead dad! Ahah! When she finally leaves, I won’t miss her.

Alli, 26 – I liked her in the sneak peek. I am always a fan of ladies with their ish together. Plus, she’s a nanny so she’ll get along with JP’s kid swimmingly.

Amy J, 31 – “I’m here for you, because it’s you.” What does that even mean?

Renee, 32 – She has baby Ben. They seemed to click over the family thing, like, a lot.

Lauren H., 25 – She’s a crier, we already know this from the sneak peek earlier. I don’t like criers.

Maggie, 24 – So sincerely happy, she forgot her name. I cannot handle how cute that accent is. She’ll be one of my favorites, just because I like accents.

PUPPY!!!!!

Kelly, 27 – She’s a dog lover, and she brought Molly! Mom thinks Kelly might be drunk!

The final car is pulling up, OH MY GOD!!! (So much screaming goes on when these girls pull up.)

Lacy, 25 – She rufied him on the first meet! Bad form.

Alexis, 24 – Generic, but he likes her.

Kylie, 23 – She left no distinguishing impression. Meh.

Sharleen, 29 – OH CANADA!!!!! Very sophisticated. (Sophisticated Sharleen)

Andi, 26 – I don’t hate their chemistry. I like her sense of humor. I think she deserves the first impression rose, but I think Nikki will get it (she got the knuckle bite).

You probably watched the first episode, so I won’t bore you with a recap, I’ll just give you some highlights of things that got said over here:

One Bachelorette said: “It’s the aggressive girls who get the attention.” Yeah, there are 27 of you, and one of him! Grow a back bone Ladies! #YOLO. Tonight is not the night to make friends. (Looking at you Lauren H.) 

Lauren H finally gets her moment and she blabs about her ex. Just Stop! Don’t lead with the former relationship, it’s always a fail. My brother just said ‘You’re blowing it right now chick! You already lost him. His face says stop talking.’

Sophisticated Sharleen, he likes her elegance. Juan Pablo called her a keeper, and she’s getting the first impression rose. I’m not sure that she likes him, but we’ll see where that goes.

And the fun part… who gets the roses?

1. Sophisticated Sharleen
2. Clare
3. Nikki the Nurse
4. Renee
5. ADA Andi
6. Nanny Alli
7. Chantel
8. Lauren S.
9. Kelly and MOLLY!!! Molly’s really getting the rose here!
10. Cassandra
11. Danielle
12. Chelsie
13. Kat – not Kylie. Awkward!!!
14. Victoria
15. Christy
16. Lucy the Lovechild
17. Elise ‘Oh My God!’
Ladies, Juan Pablo it’s the final rose tonight. (DUH!)
18. Amy L.

So we lose Lauren H., Lacey, Amy J., Kylie, Alexis, Ashley, Valerie, Maggie, and Christine. I’ll miss Maggie, but I’ll survive.

Fun fact that I learned tonight: It was really nice to know Sean doesn’t really always look like a Greek God, carved from stone! He and Catherine are clearly not jogging as much as he did when he was on the show. Enjoy your life, big boy!

(I apologize for the tardiness of this post! I’ve had some issues with the site, but I think I’ve got them all worked out now!)